Posts in Motivation

5 tips on how to be successful from Notorious B.I.G

Heinrich Heine once said that where words leave off, music begins. So true.

Words are just easier to remember when they have a ring to it; it’s more intense.This is why music is such a powerful tool in society. Add a hot beat to a message, and you can influence a nation with your beliefs.

I listen to a wide genre of music but mostly to Hip Hop. To me, Hip Hop is just an extension of poetry – with a *sick beat. And I’ve found myself tuned into some songs, after discovering subliminal material that can actually be helpful. Take rapper, Notorious B.I.G (also known as Biggie) for example. Here’s a rapper who came from a poverty stricken environment and flourished so greatly that his music is still being played, decades after his passing.

Biggie thrived because he created music from his experiences, not from made-up stories. He used the tools he had and made due with what he had, in order to succeed.

But before the hype about the laws of attraction went viral in 2002 (with the help of Rhonda Byrne’s, The Secret), Biggie was applying the same principles to his life and rapping about it. He released a song called Juicy, off the album Ready To Die, which is basically a summary of how he went from rags to riches. He died shortly after the release of the album.

In this song (Juicy), Biggie highlights five key tools for reaching success. This confirms the laws of attraction – a scientific theory suggesting that you attract whatever happens to you in life. Whatever thoughts you send out, will be returned to you by the universe.

Check out the 5 steps to success in Biggie’s Juicy lyrics:

1. Visualise what you want and imagine that you already have it.

It was all a dream

2. Study everything about your desire and practise consistently.

I used to read Word Up magazine
Salt’n’Pepa and Heavy D up in the limousine
Hangin’ pictures on my wall
Every Saturday Rap Attack, Mr Magic, Marley Marl

3. Get rid of your doubts

Livin’ life without fear
Puttin’ 5 carats in my baby girl’s ears

4. Invest to gain – show gratitude and treat others as you’d like to be treated

Spread love, it’s the Brooklyn way

5. Think positively – focus more on what you want than what you don’t have

Super Nintendo, Sega Genesis
When I was dead broke, man I couldn’t picture this
Uh, damn right I like the life I live
‘Cause I went from negative to positive
And it’s all good

“And if you don’t know, now you know”. – Notorious B.I.G

The secret revealed.

Do you have a song that inspires you, or one that gets you through the day? I’d love to know. Tell me what your go-to song is by posting a comment below.

PICS: 10 quotes that should motivate the hell out of you

Stay motivated.

One of my favourite quotes is from a fable by Paulo Coelho, called The Alchemist. It reads: “Remember that wherever your heart is, there you will find your treasure”. And I’m sure that this rings true for something in your life like your career aspirations, your love life, or any other dreams that you wish to follow. If you absolutely love what you’re doing, you can carry on for hours and not even notice the time go by.

Think about one point in your life, when you thought, “Wow! I could do this forever!” Or “I love the way this makes me feel!” That feeling, that’s what Paulo calls “your treasure” – the reward for the work you’ve put in. And like you’ll see from one of the amazing quotes below, nothing worth having comes easily.

Sometimes, during the hustle of the day, we forget why we began our journey in the first place – we take our eyes off the prize and focus on how hard it is for us to reach our goals. Then we become consumed by our challenges, and decide that we’ve had enough so we’re giving up.

But there are some people who bite through the tough times – they’re the ones who you’d admire for their success, and sometimes look to for guidance. Anyone who can work through a challenge, is someone who is closer to finding his/her treasure.

You could be one of them. Get ready and stay ready.

Here are 10 Instagram quotes that have been posted by self-motivators who keep their eye on the prize:

Check out the profiles below for more motivational quotes by simply clicking on the user’s name.





5. This is a really important one.



8. This is just so true…

9. And this one too…

10. Eric Thomas the Hip Hop Preacher said that you don’t get out of life what you want, you get out of life WHO YOU ARE. So BE the things you want. If you want great things, guess what? You need to do great things.

Special thanks to Anita Wapenaar and the folks at Cape Town International Airport, who really helped me find easy-to-use methods to managing my challenges, as well as to stay motivated.

I’d love to know which quote you liked most. You can let me know in the comment section below.

I went out with my natural hair and nothing happened

After mustering up the balls to step outside with my hair not blow-dried or flat-ironed, I thought that I was going to feel really ugly and uncomfortable, or worse, people were going to imply that my hair is ugly and make me feel uncomfortable.

This is a really big thing for me. I felt emotional when a friend told me that she loves my sun-dried hair because I never thought anyone would. I’d been having my hair straightened since my first memories and that’s no exaggeration. At school, if you had straight hair, you were absolutely beautiful, and that’s pretty much the consensus within my family as well.

So, I’ve decided that I want to do the ‘Big Chop’ as soon as spring arrives (September 2014). It may seem a bit radical to chop my hair off but I think that I need to be smacked with the realization that my beauty doesn’t lie in my hair. And this will also be a way for me to grow the hair that was given to me.
I’m interested to know your thoughts so feel free to post a comment of whether or not you’re in support of my big chop.

Last night, friends and I went to a restaurant. A tall buff-looking guy walks in to sit at the table behind us. Not too long after, a friend leans in to whisper that this guy had been staring at me for some time while waiting to be seated. I shrugged and gave a little sigh because to my mind, who would actually find me attractive with this big hair. Our meals arrive; more friends join; we have some wine; squeeze in dessert, and then leave for some living room dancing and sing-alongs. Later that night, before going to bed, I checked my phone and saw that the same guy, who was sitting at the table behind me, had managed to find my Instagram profile and liked several of my photos. Super creepy! l was stunned, to say the least. Here I am, in the dead of winter, sporting a natural hairdo (resembling a lion’s mane), and this guy thinks I’m hot. Never mind the great lengths he went to, to show it…

This is what I look like with sleek hair:







And this is me with natural Bantu knot hair:






Major difference right? I am so ready to let go of the straight-hair-is-beautiful hype. I mean, of course straight hair is beautiful but curly and wavy hair can be just as lovely. This is a way for me to accept myself as I am, and to become who I want to be. If I decide somewhere along the line, that sleek hair suits me better, I will probably revert. I just need to be sure that my image represents my brand – the person I aspire to be, and not a copy of what is socially acceptable around me.

Hands up all those who just fell in love with Ansel Elgort?

You have to see this film!

The fault in our stars (d/Josh Boone).

And then tell me Ansel Elgort isn’t absolutely dreamy as Angus Waters in the film. The two women who sat in the same row as me while watching the film, couldn’t seem to hush about the look of him.


What a dramatic love story the Fault In Our Stars is. And man was I balling my eyes out. Picture a mid-row seat, centered around a bunch of Ansel fans and readers of the book; stiff hair bun, pearl earrings, slow popcorn crunching, with eyes completely locked onto the screen. And that was pretty much the case for the entire audience, minus the hair and accessories.

Author, John Green is quite a mastermind to new-age readers. The book doesn’t have a filter of sugar coating, pretentious eloquence or wishy washy fairytale scenes. It’s a little raw with language use and I think that’s what made it such a page turner. But let me just say that Josh Boone‘s (cinematic) version is breathtaking. No spoiler alerts I promise. Except for the brief plot: Starring two cancer survivors, both in their teens, who fall inlove amid the drama and crazyness of their illnesses.

This type of film deserves top-notch ratings. Sure, there are some glitches; there’s some errors in geography, there’s the methodical loss of protagonist love, and some mismatched jargon, but if you’re not a stickler for the finer details, you won’t even notice it.

The film evokes several emotions from scene to scene. Boone has you crying one minute and then laughing like hell the next. It’s also a nice touch that you’re not coaxed into sympathizing with the protagonist, Hazel (Shailene Woodley) for having cancer; in fact there’s little room for escapism and you’re almost coached into thinking; “Hey, life is going to suck sometimes but you just have to role with the punches and get over it. “It’s possible to live with pain”, as Hazel’s mother tells her towards the end.

So touching. Bravo.

If you haven’t already seen the film, check out the link to the trailer below. Or better yet, read the book first. You can order the book now on

Watch The Fault In Our Stars | Official Trailer, here.

This is probably the most important love advice ever.

From the lyrics of a classic Beatles song – The end.

The love you take is equal to the love you make.

Don’t you think that’s so true? Everything that happens in your life is what you’ve attracted – a give and take. You’re probably thinking that if you’ve been cheated on in your life time, that you didn’t ask for it, but I’m going to say that you did – and with reason.

Anthony Robbins said that whatever you focus on, you will feel and experience at a stronger level. Whether you want it or not. That’s how powerful your thoughts are. Thoughts become things. If you see it in your mind, you will hold it in your hand (Bob Proctor).

I’m finally over being dumped three years ago.
I never gave much thought to when exactly I got over it but I know that I’m ready to move on now. I’ve had ample time to learn from the mistakes I’ve made, taken responsibility for some of the mess, and forgiven wholeheartedly. My mind wasn’t right throughout the relationship. I was too cautious, too focused on what could go wrong, and what I didn’t want to happen. And then guess what; everything I’d ever thought could go wrong, happened.

You can say that the idea of karma is mumbo jumbo, but if you look at every other living thing in the universe like the growth of trees and the tide of the ocean, it all works on a give-and-take system. That’s how love works as well.

The last time I was looking for love, I found it, but I didn’t get the love I wanted, I got that love that I’d been focusing on. I’d seen broken relationships around me like divorce, cheating, constant arguing etc… And you’d think that things won’t affect you if it doesn’t involve you, but it does. I became scared of getting into a relationship where I would be cheated on and that’s all I thought about. Not realizing that what you focus on you will find.

Before you find what you really want, you need to imagine it and become it. And if you focus SPECIFICALLY on what you want,  the success rate of your goal immediately escalates – because when you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you achieve it (Paulo Coelho).

I know that I deserve the best because I will always give my best. And when I find a man who is willing to treat me like a queen, I will be ready to serve him as one would a king.


I quit carelessness because I saw her watching.

Someone is always watching.

I have a 10-year-old niece who day-in and day-out copies me. She brushes her hair the same way, she downloads music that I listen to, and she’s even asked if she could have my clothes before I die – in a nice way.

I was laying down the other day – she knows that I usually wake up early, go for a walk, and return by the time she’s  having breakfast – so she asked if she could borrow my yoga mat to work-out and then continued to question why I didn’t go for my morning walk. She notices everything. All of a sudden she’s interested in acing calisthenics floor work and eating healthy too. So I got out of bed and went for my walk wholeheartedly.

And I’ve decided, since she’s always watching, that I need to be someone that she can really learn from. I had to think about who she’ll become if she decides to follow my path and whether I could live with that, and be proud of her.
The fact is, we’re all just versions of the people we’ve spent the most time with. A lot of who we are comes from our choices, but it’s our influences that steer us to what those choices are.

Going back to my morning walk – it’s something I enjoy doing. I needed to be reminded that I’ve been doing it for my health, for myself, and I deserve it. But also because I didn’t have a good enough excuse to stay in bed all day and I didn’t want her to think that it’s okay to quit on things because you feel like it.
At times when you think no one noticed (‘that’), or no one cares; I promise you someone’s watching and taking notes.

So if you can do one thing for the greater good of humanity, (without making this sound like a lame pageant speech) work on yourself – just do you. You’re going to inspire people to do the same.

E.T the Hip Hop preacher takes motivational speaking to the next level.

Maybe it’s not that you’re lazy, or careless, or procrastinate, maybe you just need a little motivation to get things going.

I was search through my contact list for friends who are generally motivated. I’d been feeling a bit low and I find that reading self-help books or articles, always lifts my spirits. Some said to download E.T the Hip Hop preacher App (for Android). And I’ve been drawn to the work of Eric Thomas ever since. I’m exercising than usual – I’ve just joined the calisthenics movement; it will be a hell of a long road but I hope that I will reach a level where I am able to compete.
Eric Thomas’ story is so inspiring. Here’s a guy who went from being homeless, to best-selling author, celebrity motivational coach, father and husband because he he was determined. He was homeless at some point and it took him 12 years to finish a four-year degree, but now here he is, earning millions of dollars.

The truth of the matter is that you can be/have anything you want. ANYTHING! Whatever you desire in your life – you can have it. You just needvto know exactly what you want and how far you are willing to go to get it.

People who aren’t sure of themselves don’t succeed. If you don’t know what you really want, you can’t exactly work towards having it.

You can download the E.T app for Android on Playstore or visit for motivational material. I’ve also started following E.T on Instagram, so be sure to check out his profile, here.

4 reasons why I’m giving my books away.

Books are to me what protein is to a muscle man.

For as long as I can remember, I’ve hoped that one day I would have a personal library – a room filled with racks and racks of books extending to the ceiling.For more reason than just sniffing books because I can’t resist the smell of an old book, but I’d banked on the idea that having a personal library of all the books I’d ever read, would stand as a symbol of my appreciation of them, as well as a symbol of my intellect.

So, a few days ago, I decided that I am going to give most of my jewels away. Here’s four reasons why:

To travel light
They’re heavy, fragile and inconvenient to carry. And if you know a story like the back of your hand, you probably won’t bother picking up that book again. Give it a new owner and you’ll be thanked for it. Also, I when I die, I’d like to leave as little material things behind ( something I’ll be sharing in a later post).

To share knowledge
Everyone knows that knowledge is power, and that those who serve, rule. Don’t be afraid to share your stories with others because those people may have new books to share with you, affording you something new to learn.

To give back
We live in a me-centric time where everything is about what can be done for us and too little of what we can do for others. You’re really saving a tree when you give your old books away. Not to mention making space for new and intriguing reads.

For conversation starters
There’s nothing like finding a friend who likes the same book as you, and if you get really into it you could go on for hours discussing your favourite parts. It’s not enough to just read books, you need to bring them to life using your own words and actions; this will be a great way to make new friends and attract people with similar interests.

So tomorrow when you see me and I’m handing you a book, you’ll know the reason.

Please don’t go chucking your textbooks away or handing out things you’ve never read. That is not the point. Reflect on these four themes and join me if you’re keen or let me know what you think.
Lastly, don’t be too selective of who you give them to, someone you never thought would enjoy a certain book, may surprise you.

1 week: 1 wedding, 1 funeral, and a birthday party.

It’s been an eventful week filled with laughter and tears.

What have I learnt this week? You can’t just pass the days surviving, you need to engineer your life, work it. When you begin to feel like an extremist, you’re on the right track.

The week: exciting and draining – I lived between two extremes and you won’t believe it until you read it.

My family lost a legend, a charismatic women beyond physical beauty, and that’s depressing. But we also acknowledge that she lived a good life, and that she expressed gratitude to her deathbed. She was pretty amazing.


Her death brought about lots of crying, reminiscing, and wishful conversing, but not mourning.

People are usually so selfish about death; they worry about what they’ve lost and how much their lives will change, but there was none of that; just gratitude and sharing.

Then as the weekend drew near, I had to prepare for a friend’s wedding; a partner of two ambitious beings, who are so deeply inlove.


I don’t think I’ve seen love like theirs before; it’s quite charming and hopeful.

I went to the wedding alone and for some time during the reception, sat by myself as well, watching them. Ofcourse I didn’t think it was weird since I came out especially to see them wed, and it was beautiful.  But I left shortly after their first dance to get ready for a birthday party, and ended up listening to a man rant of how he wished that he could have a fraction of what they have, to extremity.

The story of his relationship was nothing but thorns and twigs it seemed, he even went so far as to say that he hated his life right now, feeling trapped in his relationship. It was awful. And I remember thinking, “good God, this is why I’m single”; ” I really don’t want to have to go through this”.
But then I realized that delving into the unknown can really bring you anything; maybe you find the love of your life, or the bane of your existence, it’s such a gamble. You can play it safe and risk nothing, lose nothing, and gain nothing. But that will not be living.

Then came Alexandra’s birthday party, which I have to say fit right into the mess of emotions I’d been experiencing throughout the week.

(Photo/Kirsten Holman)

I needed to unwind a little and it was just the perfect situation for a good drink, dance and great company. Followed by a sunday in bed, watching too many episodes of series.

What a week right?

Cancer, you vicious bastard

You will never believe the morning I’ve had.

After a great struggle to get out of bed, I went to visit my dearest uncle. I was two-minded about going to see him because he lives very far and I was planning to have a rested day of pampering myself. I hadn’t seen this side of my family in a while so I figured it would do me some selfless good to go and see how he was doing.

Nothing could prepare me for what I was about to see. The night before, my cousin, his daughter, had called to tell me that he was really sick. She said that he had asked to see me weeks ago, but I had been too busy to make the visit. She was so eager for me to come and see him that she’d offered to fetch me from my house and take me home again, so I knew it had to be serious.

I decided to take the trek and in just short of an hour, I was there.
I walked through the richly varnished doorway and I could sense the urgency for our meeting. His name is Henry, but everyone calls him Basil- by his second name. He is my mother’s eldest brother, and a true stickler for attention to detail.

I had to climb some red stairs on the way to his room and there I saw him lying flat on his bed, covered in a sweat of his stage 4 cancer. My mind could not prepare my eyes for such a sight fast enough, to which I immediately burst into tears. He laid there bedridden and delirious, fighting just to keep his eyes open.
I sat at his side and in my best Afrikaans, told him that I was here. This of course made no sense to him because he didn’t recognize me, not even a mumble of recollection. And that hurt. It hurt so much to see him in that state that I had to leave the room to control my tears. To see a man so put-together, so disorientated, is a sight that I don’t wish you to ever see. Despite my very self-centered morning feelings, this man’s life means a great deal to me.

So when I eventually walked back into the room, I stroked his head and I kept telling him that I was there, hoping that he would realize that there was someone else visiting, in support for his recovery. His daughter came and served him a sip of water; again, telling him that I was there, and with that he turned to me and asked, “When did you get here?” Now, if you know the harmful effects of cancer, you know that added medication like morphine causes a patient to see double or blurred vision, but he saw me. For less than a minute- with a sound state of mind, he really saw me. He asked me when I’d gotten there and he cried, then we all cried with him too.

That was my morning.

That was my smack awake for wasting days, a warning to value my own life and the lives of others, to see as much as I can see, before God-forbid, something like a killer disease comes to steal my life from me.

Now, it’s family over everything.Uncle Basil and I