Posts tagged how to be a grown-up

From Zero to Adult: How to be taken seriously in life

5 things adults do that earns them respect:

Not that I’m an expert at 24. A friend, nearly twice my age once joked that she had shoes older than I am. So what could I possibly know about being a ‘grown-up’?

I’ve befriended people from all walks of life, and different ages. I’d never have guessed that I’d be mixing with 30 and 40-somethings one night and then be heading off to a 21st birthday the next. I’m lucky to know a diverse group of people; they teach me more than I would have learnt, had I only hung out with people of my age group.

I’ve met enough people to realize that age doesn’t come with maturity, you mature with age because of experiences and if you haven’t exposed yourself to the wonders of the world, you won’t be equipped to survive on your own. Some people in their 50’s are still finding their ‘path’, while others in their tweens are already hard pressed on pursuing their 5-year plans. The only way to be taken seriously in life is to develop some rituals:

Show up

When you’re an adult, you’re expected to stand by your commitments. Being flaky is the easiest way to be marked as unreliable. Those kinds of people aren’t ever taken seriously. If one day you weren’t in the mood to go to work, you call your boss with an excuse and he/she approves, they’re either letting your work load pile up or looking for a replacement because the show must go on. So unless you’re working on your own or for yourself, you are dispensable.

Own up

Everyone loves a person who can take responsibility for their own actions and improve upon it.

Love sparingly

Focus on what you love and you will live a prosperous lie. Don’t give much attention to negative things that are harmful to you. Gossiping and constant complaining for example, can really exhaust you – you also lose time to work on what’s actually bothering you. Mature adults discuss ideas, rather than people.

Hustle

The first time I heard the word hustle, I was listening to a rap song. I honestly thought that it was slang for “do what you need  to do” ( don’t ask me how old I was). Later, I saw a quote by Abraham Lincoln with the word hustle in it, and thought, “Woah! Lincoln was dope“. He said, “Things may come to those who wait, but only the things left by those who hustle.” Adults are way more competitive than kids on the playground, they just behave differently and don’t nag about it. If there are things that you want to do in your lifetime, do it, or someone else will beat you to it.

Speak up

On to the best part, you’re the boss of you. You choose your clothes, you buy your food, and you pay for your own petrol. Some people are naturally withdrawn and shy anyway from being heard by those around them, and by that I mean saying what they feel, agreeing, disagreeing, offering new ideas or simply making new friends. If you represent yourself with a confident voice, you’re literally branding yourself as someone who should be listened to, admired, or respected.

Do you have more more points  to add to the list? Follow me on Instagram and Facebook, or email me to robyn@bewhole.co.za. I’d love to hear from you.

 

I quit carelessness because I saw her watching.

Someone is always watching.

I have a 10-year-old niece who day-in and day-out copies me. She brushes her hair the same way, she downloads music that I listen to, and she’s even asked if she could have my clothes before I die – in a nice way.

I was laying down the other day – she knows that I usually wake up early, go for a walk, and return by the time she’s  having breakfast – so she asked if she could borrow my yoga mat to work-out and then continued to question why I didn’t go for my morning walk. She notices everything. All of a sudden she’s interested in acing calisthenics floor work and eating healthy too. So I got out of bed and went for my walk wholeheartedly.

And I’ve decided, since she’s always watching, that I need to be someone that she can really learn from. I had to think about who she’ll become if she decides to follow my path and whether I could live with that, and be proud of her.
The fact is, we’re all just versions of the people we’ve spent the most time with. A lot of who we are comes from our choices, but it’s our influences that steer us to what those choices are.

Going back to my morning walk – it’s something I enjoy doing. I needed to be reminded that I’ve been doing it for my health, for myself, and I deserve it. But also because I didn’t have a good enough excuse to stay in bed all day and I didn’t want her to think that it’s okay to quit on things because you feel like it.
                              
At times when you think no one noticed (‘that’), or no one cares; I promise you someone’s watching and taking notes.

So if you can do one thing for the greater good of humanity, (without making this sound like a lame pageant speech) work on yourself – just do you. You’re going to inspire people to do the same.