After mustering up the balls to step outside with my hair not blow-dried or flat-ironed, I thought that I was going to feel really ugly and uncomfortable, or worse, people were going to imply that my hair is ugly and make me feel uncomfortable.
This is a really big thing for me. I felt emotional when a friend told me that she loves my sun-dried hair because I never thought anyone would. I’d been having my hair straightened since my first memories and that’s no exaggeration. At school, if you had straight hair, you were absolutely beautiful, and that’s pretty much the consensus within my family as well.
So, I’ve decided that I want to do the ‘Big Chop’ as soon as spring arrives (September 2014). It may seem a bit radical to chop my hair off but I think that I need to be smacked with the realization that my beauty doesn’t lie in my hair. And this will also be a way for me to grow the hair that was given to me.
I’m interested to know your thoughts so feel free to post a comment of whether or not you’re in support of my big chop.
Last night, friends and I went to a restaurant. A tall buff-looking guy walks in to sit at the table behind us. Not too long after, a friend leans in to whisper that this guy had been staring at me for some time while waiting to be seated. I shrugged and gave a little sigh because to my mind, who would actually find me attractive with this big hair. Our meals arrive; more friends join; we have some wine; squeeze in dessert, and then leave for some living room dancing and sing-alongs. Later that night, before going to bed, I checked my phone and saw that the same guy, who was sitting at the table behind me, had managed to find my Instagram profile and liked several of my photos. Super creepy! l was stunned, to say the least. Here I am, in the dead of winter, sporting a natural hairdo (resembling a lion’s mane), and this guy thinks I’m hot. Never mind the great lengths he went to, to show it…
This is what I look like with sleek hair:
And this is me with natural Bantu knot hair:
Major difference right? I am so ready to let go of the straight-hair-is-beautiful hype. I mean, of course straight hair is beautiful but curly and wavy hair can be just as lovely. This is a way for me to accept myself as I am, and to become who I want to be. If I decide somewhere along the line, that sleek hair suits me better, I will probably revert. I just need to be sure that my image represents my brand – the person I aspire to be, and not a copy of what is socially acceptable around me.
J
Awesome!
So many times we care too much about what others think, I think it’s time we start appreciating our own natural features…
Caz
I’m going through a similar hair journey right now! And I totally support what you’re doing here.
A few years ago I went for the Big Chop – after years of straitening and destroying my strand, I needed a clean break and shaved it all off. I haven’t applied any straitening agents to my hair since then, and my natural tribal curl also resembles a feisty lion’s mane!
Am slowly building up the courage to wear my hair in its natural state out in public, though. So strength to you, girl!
Robyn
Thanks for sharing Caryn. It really helps to have the support of someone who can relate when you’re going again the grain. All the best with your journey 🙂
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You Probably heard people tell you that you look kinda like Elle Varner and she too is great when it comes to the Natural hair look. Stunning 🙂
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Loved this – I like that he found you on Insta – modern day romance
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Hahaha! Stacey, this post reminds me of where I started. Thank you for your comment. I can’t believe that it’s been three years.
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lol I’m literally stalking you right now – I don’t know how many articles I’ve read and vids I’ve watched. You’re very pretty – like I have seen pics on Facebook so I know what you look like but seriously, you’re so gorgeous <3
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thank you so much for the support and complimented. You have no idea how happy it makes me to know that someone is interested in what I wrote <3
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